How would you describe your relationship with yourself? Is it healthy or toxic? Although many people are lucky to have a great self-relationship, many others struggle with this. Some often judge themselves harshly, fail to take care of themselves, allow people to walk all over them, and others even hate themselves.

Learning how to build a better relationship with yourself is important because it affects your quality of life. Additionally, the relationship you have with yourself affects all the others you have with other people because it usually influences your perspective, actions, and feelings. Read on for some tips to help you discover how to build a healthy relationship with yourself so you can become a better version of yourself and be happier.

How to Build a Better Relationship with Yourself

  1. Know your worth

The way you let other people treat you can affect how you view yourself, thus, your self-relationship. So, if you usually allow people to walk all over you, abuse you, take advantage of you, or take you for granted, it is no wonder your relationship with yourself is damaged.

You may hate yourself and often self-sabotage because you believe you are worthless. You could also rely on others to be happy and seek their validation to know whether you deserve some things such as success, love, wealth, and more. Since you are here to learn how to build a better relationship with yourself, one of the first steps to take is to recognize your self-worth.

When you value yourself, you will stand up for yourself, say no to things you don’t support, ask for what you deserve, and not allow anyone to take you for granted or abuse you. You will feel much better about yourself afterward and have a healthier self-relationship.

READ ALSO: 10 Reasons Why You Should Stop Being Too Nice

  1. Believe in yourself

One of the worst ways you can fail yourself is by lacking self-confidence. Failure to trust your abilities and judgments could keep you stuck in life as you will lack the courage to take risks and explore your potential. Since any healthy relationship is built on trust, so should your relationship with yourself.

As you learn how to build a better relationship with yourself, you must find ways to boost your self-confidence. You can become more confident by overcoming self-doubt, having role models to look up to, making lifestyle changes, and identifying your strengths, weaknesses, motivations, or passions.

When you start believing in yourself, it will be easier for you to go after the things you want and take risks, and hence you will reach your full potential and be successful. You will also be realistic when setting goals because you know your limits, and thus you are aware of when you are asking too much from yourself.

  1. Forgive yourself

Do you usually judge yourself harshly, hold on to the past, and blame yourself for things you or others have done? If you tend to do these things, learn how to build a better relationship with yourself and start having more self-compassion.

When you mess up, take responsibility for your actions; then forgive yourself, let go of the past, and move on. The things that occurred in the past already happened, and there is nothing you can do to change them now. You will realize that blaming yourself for past mistakes only destroys your relationship with yourself and keeps you stuck. So be kind to yourself and learn to forgive yourself for mistakes and failures.

READ ALSO: 7 Reasons Why Mistakes Are Important (and How to Avoid Making Them)

  1. Spend some time alone

Modern life is fast-paced with everything and everyone vying for your attention and time. We work too much, spend a lot of time on digital devices or with others, and rarely spare any time for ourselves; to spend some quiet time alone doing nothing or engaging in things that make us happy.

Unfortunately, being too busy and never really being 100% present can make you disconnect from your inner self. If you want to learn how to build a better relationship with yourself, you must start allocating some time in your schedule for me time. You can use this time to do nothing but rest and sleep, pamper yourself, take a walk in nature, practice meditation, engage in a hobby, learn a new skill, or check in on yourself.

When you spend time alone, you will connect to your inner self and get to know or understand yourself better through self-reflection and the other activities you do during your me time, and thus improve your relationship with yourself.

  1. Take care of your health

How do you take care of your health and well-being? Do you do anything for your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual wellness? If you don’t, it is time you realize that your health should always be a priority. So, as you learn how to build a better relationship with yourself, you should start putting yourself first and practicing self-care.

Some activities you can do in order to take care of your health include; eating healthy foods, exercising, limiting alcohol consumption, spending time with loved ones, consulting a therapist, driving safely, going for regular medical checkups, getting enough sleep, engaging in leisure activities, and practicing meditation.

When you lead a healthy lifestyle, your body will reward you by performing its functions well and ensuring you live longer. If you don’t, the opposite will happen. So, build a healthy relationship with yourself for your future.

READ ALSO: 20 Healthy Habits to Start in Your 20s

  1. Learn to love yourself unconditionally

If you don’t love any aspect of yourself, then it is not surprising that your self-relationship is a mess. You will frequently criticize yourself for what you consider to be imperfections and blame yourself for mistakes and failures.

But your relationship with yourself is the most important one you will ever have. You can never escape yourself, and there is no other body or life for you to live other than your own. You are the only one you will be with for your entire life. As such, practicing self-love is one of the best things to do if you want to learn how to build a better relationship with yourself.

You have to discover how to love yourself and accept that you are not perfect, nor are you supposed to be. Instead of focusing on what you think are flaws, change your mindset and view them as the things that make you unique or relatable, and accept that they are a part of what makes you who you are. If you make mistakes, don’t beat yourself up for them. Instead, forgive yourself, pick yourself up, and reset your goals. After all, you wouldn’t harm someone you love, would you? Be that person you love.

You could also practice affirmations and positive self-talk to remind you to love and accept yourself, flaws and all. They will help you reframe your thoughts so you can build a healthy relationship with yourself.

  1. Be authentic 

In today’s world where social media reigns and society dictates how we should behave and who we should be, it can be challenging to be authentic. Most people often change themselves while trying to conform to social norms and be accepted. Others put on a façade as they try to fit in and be like everyone else.

If you try to meet other people’s expectations, you will most likely lose your authenticity. And since you are not being true to yourself, you may have internal conflict as you could be doing things that go against your beliefs and values. When learning how to build a better relationship with yourself, you must embrace your authentic self unapologetically.

Pay attention to your intuition, stop worrying about what others think, and start making decisions that align with your values and beliefs. Since there will be no pretenses or internal conflict, you will build a healthy relationship yourself and accept who you are. So, start showing people the real you!

READ ALSO: 10 Things You Should Never Apologize for

  1. Date yourself

How do you treat the people you love, for example, your romantic partner, family, and friends? Any good relationship should be a two-way street, and your self-relationship is no different. Love your body, and it will love you back. If you are learning how to build a better relationship with yourself, one of the best things to do is treat yourself like you would someone you love by dating yourself.

Dating yourself involves investing your time, money, and effort into caring for yourself and making yourself feel loved, just as you would a romantic partner. If you want to build a healthy relationship with yourself, dress up and take yourself out on dates, pamper yourself, buy some flowers, do fun activities alone, compliment yourself, and try new things.

Dating yourself promotes your personal growth as it makes you more confident. You also become self-sufficient because you learn how to rely only on yourself for happiness and other things. You will start valuing yourself more as you get to know how you deserve to be treated through your own actions. As you can see, learning how to build a healthy relationship with yourself will help you create better relationships with others.

  1. Make a habit of thanking your body

When you have ‘flaws’ or are ill, you may hate yourself and engage in self-abuse. But by doing so, you forget all the good things your body enables you to do. For example, walking, talking, hearing, working, and many more activities.

As you learn how to build a better relationship with yourself, it is good to form the habit of thanking your body for everything it lets you do. Write these things down in a journal. No matter how bad things get, you can’t lack one good thing for which to thank your body. After all, you are still here and breathing.

Instead of focusing on what your body can’t do or how it has failed you in the past, choose to focus on the good things it can do and practice gratitude. Someone is out there wishing they had a body and life like yours.

READ ALSO: 22 Things to Be Thankful for and Why

  1. Improve your self-awareness

When learning how to build a better relationship with yourself, your self-awareness plays a key role. You should identify your strengths, weaknesses, thought patterns, beliefs, feelings, actions, and triggers.

Building a healthy relationship with yourself requires you to pay attention to your inner world. It is, therefore, important for you to increase your self-awareness and keep checking in on yourself to determine what you are feeling and thinking, what you can do, how things affect you, and what motivates your actions.

When you become self-aware, you will notice when your actions and thoughts don’t align with your goals and values, become better at managing your emotions, and make better decisions. Increasing self-awareness makes you a better observer of yourself, which is crucial when you want to improve your relationship with yourself and be the best version of yourself.

Final Thoughts

And there you have them – the above are some of the best ways to build a better relationship with yourself. As you can see, the relationship you have with yourself is very important because it affects many other aspects of your life, especially when it comes to happiness and satisfaction. It also affects your relationships with others, whether platonic or romantic. So, use the above tips to learn how to build a healthy relationship with yourself and improve your quality of life.


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Last Updated on October 26, 2022