Let’s be honest; many of us are very judgmental, whether of ourselves or others. But the unfortunate thing is that being a judgmental person can affect your life and relationships negatively. You may always find something to criticize about yourself and others, often jump to conclusions about people or situations, and, perhaps, even think you are better than everyone else.
If you are usually a judgy person, it is important to learn how to be less judgmental of yourself and others. And, in this post, we shall discuss several ways to stop being judgmental and be a better version of yourself.
How to Be Less Judgmental of Yourself and Others
- Increase your self-awareness
It is easy to see what other people are doing wrong than to notice your own bad behavior. So, if you want to learn how to be less judgmental of yourself and others, you need to increase your self-awareness first. You can do this by self-reflecting and analyzing your thoughts and reactions to other people’s decisions and actions.
While reflecting, you may notice that you probably do the same things or worse than what you judge others for doing. If you don’t think you should be judged for your actions, stop judging others as well. When you become self-aware, you will pay more attention to your negative thoughts about others and yourself. Hence, it will be easier to notice when you are being judgmental and stop it.
- Stop chasing and expecting perfection
It is not right to expect yourself or others to always be perfect because perfection is unattainable. We are just human and we can’t always manage to do things right all the time. As such, when learning how to be less judgmental of yourself and others, one of the first steps to take is to remind yourself that you are not perfect and neither is everyone else, nor should they be.
If you chase and expect perfection from yourself and others, you will likely be frequently disappointed and frustrated by what you consider failures and flaws. So, learn how to stop being judgmental and accept your own and other people’s imperfections.
READ ALSO: How to Stop Comparing Yourself with Others
- Avoid generalizing
Do you know how it feels to be accused of something you didn’t do? That’s the same way it feels when you judge people by generalizing them based on things such as their age, culture, race, gender, and education levels, among other things.
It is quite easy to generalize things and people rather than analyze their complexity and uniqueness. But, by doing so, you would be unfair to those who do not fit the description or label you put on them. Since you likely don’t want to hurt or alienate some people, learn how to be less judgmental of others by avoiding generalization.
If you have to judge someone, evaluate their actions individually, not as a group. Find a way to identify when you are judging people based on assumptions, prejudices, and existing beliefs.
- Embrace and love the whole you
We often judge ourselves more harshly than anyone else does. We will be the first to point out the things we find fault with about ourselves, whether it is our bodies, personalities, or quirks, among other things. To fit in or be acceptable, you may even try to change yourself to tone down your weirdness and uniqueness.
However, if you want to learn how to be less judgmental of yourself, you need to embrace and love everything that makes you, you. After all, if you don’t love and accept your true self, how can anyone else love and accept you? Learn how to stop being judgmental of yourself by practicing self-love and being compassionate with yourself.
- Be empathetic
It is easy to judge someone when you have no idea how it feels to be them or in the same situation. You can’t relate to what they are going through or understand what motivates their actions. But the one thing you have to understand is that everyone is struggling with something in their life and, most times, even when their actions seem irrational or bad, there are reasons for them.
Being empathetic is crucial if you want to learn how to be less judgmental of yourself and others. When tempted to judge someone’s decisions or actions, pause and put yourself in their shoes. How would you feel or react if you were in the same situation? What if someone judged you? By developing empathy, you will stop being judgmental and be kinder and more accepting of others going forward.
- Cut off bad influences
Did you know that the people you surround yourself with can influence you to be a judgy person? Perhaps you have been hanging out with gossips, pessimists, or overly critical people. If those you spend most of your time with are frequently judging you or others, it will be no surprise when you also become a judgmental person.
If you want to learn how to be less judgmental of yourself and others, cut off the toxic people who influence you to be judgy. You will be so much happier when you no longer have to listen to such types of people constantly judging you or others.
- Keep an open-mind
Oftentimes, we judge others when their actions do not align with what we consider right. But everyone has their own values, upbringing, culture, experiences, and circumstances that guide their actions and way of thinking. By being close-minded and judging others for doing things you feel are controversial, you could alienate them, hence, miss out on making new friends or gaining a new perspective.
When learning how to be less judgmental of others, be open-minded and accepting of things and people who are different from what you are used to. It doesn’t mean that you have to disregard your own values; just observe, listen, and be open to other people’s values and views instead of being judgy. Even when you don’t agree with them, respect their opinions and actions (of course, only if they are not hurting anyone).
- Mind your own business
Are you the kind of person who often gives unsolicited advice and opinions to people about their private lives? Why do you feel the need to intrude and judge other people’s actions and choices?
One of the key things to remember when you are learning how to be less judgmental of others is that what they choose to do with their life doesn’t concern you. If their actions do not impact you either directly or indirectly, mind your own business and let them live their life however they want.
You likely don’t know the whole story to fully understand a situation, and thus you should stop being judgmental of others and keep your opinions or advice to yourself. Furthermore, they are the ones who have to live with their choices and any consequences that may occur because of their actions, not you. So, leave them be.
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Are you a judgmental person? If you are, hopefully, the above tips will help you learn how to be less judgmental of yourself and others. As mentioned earlier, being a judgmental person can negatively affect your life and your relationships with others. It could make it harder for you to make friends and keep them in your life.
Being judgmental of yourself could also make you lack self-confidence and have self-esteem issues. So, if you are usually a judgy person, become a better version of yourself by using the above tips to learn how to stop being judgmental of yourself and others.
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