Are you considering starting to date yourself? Since you are here, you probably have thought about it and want to learn how to date yourself. Or perhaps you have heard someone say they are doing it, and you are wondering what dating yourself means. Telling those who ask you intrusive questions about your relationship status that you are dating yourself and building a relationship with yourself usually leaves them confused on what you mean by that. Some may think that you are crazy, narcissistic, have given up on relationships, you can’t find anyone to love you, or that you are in the closet and too afraid to come out. So, in this post, we shall discuss what dating yourself is, how to date yourself and why you should do it.

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What Does It Mean to Date Yourself?

We all know how dating other people looks like because we see it everywhere, from real life to movies and books, but rarely do we see single people portrayed as happy or content with their lives and going on solo dates. But you can be single and happy as well. One way to be happy and satisfied with your life regardless of your relationship status is to learn how to date yourself. Dating yourself means that you dedicate your time, money, and energy to taking care of yourself, making yourself feel loved, connecting with your inner self, and building a healthy relationship with yourself.


Dating yourself is not only good for you now but also prepares you for the other relationships you might have in the future if you choose to enter into them. If you get into a relationship, remember that dating yourself is not for single people exclusively because anyone can benefit from it.

Since we are heading to the month of love with Valentine’s Day fast approaching, this post will help you learn the reasons why you should date yourself and how to do it and be content with your life the way it is. So what does dating yourself look like?


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How to Date Yourself

Dating yourself is simple, and it is one of the best things you can do for yourself. It is similar to dating other people, only that when dating yourself, you focus more on yourself and what makes you happy. When preparing for your first date, choose activities that you enjoy doing, whether at home or elsewhere, pick a date, and try to make it a special day by doing whatever you need to do to feel and look good. If you are just now learning how to date yourself, here are some ideas of things to do on solo dates;

  • Take yourself out on dates at your favorite restaurants and try different meals and drinks.
  • Attend an event by yourself.
  • Go to the movies or watch one from the comfort of your couch.
  • Get yourself some romantic gifts and flowers.
  • Go to a concert alone.
  • Pamper yourself by giving yourself and trying an at-home spa night, having a bubble bath, lighting some scented candles, and using essential oils.
  • Have some fun at home alone by dancing around your house, having a karaoke night, listening to music, doing a hobby, or anything else that makes you happy.
  • Go outdoors on a picnic, to enjoy nature, hike, bike, or become a tourist in your own town.
  • Plan a vacation or staycation.
  • Curl up with a good book.
  • Make your favorite dish, drink some wine, prepare a table for yourself and eat under candlelight.
  • Behave the same way you would if you had a partner and dress up, show up on time, unplug during meals and pay attention to yourself and your feelings, and set a romantic atmosphere, etc.
  • Try new things.
  • Compliment yourself and take compliments from others but don’t fish for them.
  • Try to catch a view of the sunset.
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8 Reasons Why You Should Date Yourself

  1. To love yourself more

The best time to practice self-love and build a healthy relationship with yourself is when you are single, and one of the ways to achieve these is through dating yourself. Fall in love with yourself by using the time you are dating yourself to get to know who you are better, your strengths, weaknesses, ‘flaws’, or values, and doing things that make you feel good.

Treat yourself as you would a romantic partner if you had one. Thus, spoil yourself, pay attention to yourself, and put as much effort as you would if you were going out with someone else. When doing all these things, you will get to know how you deserve to be treated and learn how to love and value yourself, which are good reasons why you should date yourself.

READ ALSO: You Are Good Enough: 5 Ways to Recognize Your Self-Worth

  1. To practice self-care

Self-care is one of the things that often gets neglected when dating other people. You put all your energy into taking care and pleasing someone else and forget that you also need some tender loving care. When dating yourself, you no longer have to put all your energy and efforts into someone else and can thus, take care of yourself without worrying about anyone.

Having the opportunity to put yourself or your needs first and practicing self-care are some of the reasons why you should date yourself. Some ways to practice self-care when learning how to date yourself include pampering yourself, getting a massage, having a manicure and pedicure, planning a staycation, doing aromatherapy at home, getting your hair done, and many other activities that make you feel and look good.

  1. For your personal growth

One of the benefits of learning how to date yourself is that it promotes personal growth. By dating yourself, you get to know who you are better, become more confident and independent. You learn how to get out of your comfort zone and own your life and decisions.

Due to worries about what others might think, in your early days of dating yourself things such as taking yourself out on dates and sitting at that restaurant or club alone will be scary. But as you get used to it, you will realize that most people don’t even care that you are alone. As you gain more confidence approaching people and situations alone, you might even make new friends and dare to do things you would never have tried if you were with someone.

It will be a lonely and sad life if you decide to never go to places you want to go because you have no one to go with or pay your bills. Your personal growth is one of the best reasons why you should date yourself.

  1. Dating yourself is fun

Dating yourself can be a lot of fun because it is all about you and what makes you happy. You can be spontaneous and do things without worrying about including anyone else and their interests in your plans. Whether that is taking yourself out on a date, staying in, singing karaoke by yourself, watching a movie, dancing, going for a photoshoot, making your favorite meals, or going on random vacations. All the fun you can have when alone is one of the best reasons why you should date yourself.

READ ALSO: 12 Fun Activities to Do When Spending Thanksgiving Alone

  1. To build better relationships with others

Dating yourself before getting into new relationships is one of the best things you can do for yourself, especially if you have personal baggage you haven’t dealt with yet. You will have more time to work on yourself and your issues instead of bringing them to a new relationship, and thus, will be ready to build better healthier relationships with others when the time comes.

When dating yourself, you also learn self-love and self-sufficiency, and hence, depend only on yourself for your happiness without burdening others with trying to make you happy. Some problems that often happen in relationships, for example, extreme jealousy, being clingy, loss of identity, or self-sabotage, occur less often among couples who know themselves, their worth, and what they want to do with their lives.

Building a better relationship with others, whether it is your relationship with friends, family, or your future significant others, is one of the best reasons why you should date yourself. Other benefits of dating yourself for your relationships are that by learning to love and take care of yourself first, you will be able to take care, love, and help others better. 

READ ALSO: 5 Best Ways to Invest in Yourself for a Better Future

  1. You don’t have to compromise

Since we are all different with varying interests, dating other people usually involves a lot of compromising on things, on where to go for dates, what to do, where to live, and many other things. Even though compromising helps you build a healthy relationship, having some time to focus on yourself, what you want, and your views will be great for you.

If you usually have people-pleasing tendencies, no longer having to compromise on things is one of the best reasons why you should date yourself. You won’t have to evaluate options, vote, or try to align schedules in order to be fair to everyone if you date yourself. By not having to compromise on things, you will have more fun and new experiences and still be accountable if things don’t go well.

  1. You don’t have to please anyone

When preparing for a date with someone else, you would probably obsess over how you look, what to wear, have fear of being judged for your meal choices or the amount you eat, what you do, your family, or the activities you want to do. Perhaps, you also worry about letting them down if you do or fail to do something.

Not having to please anyone other than yourself is one of the reasons why you should date yourself because your opinion will matter most to you. Some benefits of dating yourself are that you can be unapologetically yourself, do what you want, eat what you want, and wear whatever makes you feel good without fearing judgment from anyone or whether you will please them.

READ ALSO: 10 Things You Should Never Apologize for

  1. No risk of getting hurt

When you decide to date yourself, there is no risk of getting hurt because someone stood you up, cheated on you, didn’t remember your anniversary, or abused you in any other way, which are things that often happen when dating other people. The responsibility to show up and treat yourself the way you would like to be treated is on you, and this is one of the reasons why you should date yourself.

Dating yourself helps you know your worth and learn how you deserve to be treated, which will be great for your future relationships. You will discover what you can put up with and what you can’t. Also, if you usually have trouble trusting other people or fear intimacy and often push the ones you love away, taking the time to slow down and date yourself first instead of other people can help you heal and get to a better place mentally. Dating yourself gives you a chance to get your life back and be okay with being by yourself.

Final thoughts

Your happiness should not depend on your relationship status or the people you spend time with. Instead, take charge of your life and happiness by learning how to date yourself. You will enjoy the many benefits of dating yourself, such as increased confidence, self-sufficiency, self-love, and better mental health. You will also find ways to be happy by yourself and learn how to be okay with being alone. 

These are only a few of the reasons why you should date yourself. Try doing it and experience the many other benefits of dating yourself first hand.

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